If you serve as a president, CEO, or executive director, you know you can become isolated, or feel lonely because there are few people who understand the complexity of your responsibilities. You may be treated with respect or find that people expect you to have super-human powers and the ability to meet very high expectations. If you are serving in such a leadership role, it can be difficult to gain an honest assessment. Who will have the expertise, wisdom, and information relevant to your specific situation along with an understanding of the context you are working within?
We recommend building a selective circle of informal advisors who you can trust. These should be people who understand the multiple challenges you may be facing. At any given point in time you may want to turn to one or more of these people to gain knowledge, and to share your understanding of the situation while asking for theirs. You don’t want “yes people,” meaning those who will agree with you regardless of the facts. You don’t need guidance from those who agree with you out of deference, loyalty, or fear. You want people who understand the context and community in which you are operating. Build relationships with those who align with your vision, as well as those who value the institution or organization but see things differently than you do.
You want to know if others see the facts in the same way you do, and whether or not the “facts” you are working with are really facts. You want to gain an understanding of what you don’t know whether this be data, relationships, financial information, political alignments, or what we once called “gossip,” or the word on the street. When you trust people you can ask, “ What am I not seeing? What do I not know?”
For each person the circle of trust will be comprised of different types of people. Consider including individuals such as your board chair, the CFO, the VP or director of development, a consistent major donor, your chief of staff, a peer from a comparable organization in another community, and a local or regional influencer. Guidance and information from this circle can help ensure that you are connected with the board that hired you and that you understand their priorities. Cabinet members such as the CFO, VP for development, and your chief of staff will know that you depend on them for data-driven current information and trends, not optimistic generalizations, or old data. A trusted relationship with a major donor can help you understand how your institution or organization is understood by those with the capacity to make major gifts or investments. Other valuable insights can come from trust-based relationships with individuals from across your campus, if a college or university president; and from those you serve (and have served in the past) if you are another type of nonprofit. Take the time to develop these relationships so you know who is whispering in your ear.
© 2026 Mel and Pearl Shaw, authors of “Prerequisites for Fundraising Success.” We provide fundraising counsel to higher education, nonprofits, and philanthropy. Video conferencing always available. Visit www.saadandshaw.com.
